Staying Connected: Self-Care and Time Management for Extroverts

Do you get frustrated or bored if you have a task that you need to do quietly by yourself without getting to collaborate or talk with people? Do you feel most energized when interacting with groups of people, and get listless or drained when you miss out too much on the social interaction you crave? Do you tend to process your thoughts best by bouncing them off someone else and maybe have a harder time thinking things through in isolation? You might be an extrovert. Extroverts typically thrive on connection with others, and find that connection feeds their energy level. Doing things on your own without company for long lengths of time can actually tire you out if you’re an extrovert… just the opposite of an introvert!  It’s pretty neat how we all are so different.

Our culture is full of social opportunities for extroverts, but certain kinds of tasks and processes can still be challenging for you to manage because they seem to require long periods of focused, internally directed work – work that’s often done alone. I also know extroverts who have a hard time getting things done around the house if no one else is around, or incorporating exercise into their lives because exercise seems like a solitary activity to them. Alone time can be especially challenging for extroverts who live by themselves.

Often, interactivity, collaboration and company can be worked into an activity if you take a moment and look for ways to do it. Perhaps an exercise class, walking partner or gym buddy will make exercise more fun. Maybe you can find a few team members to meet with you for half an hour to bounce ideas off them for the project you’re working on, in return for your doing the same for them once in a while. Maybe housework would be more fun if you put on a phone headset and called friends and family members you want to catch up with. Maybe your spouse will make dinner with you and clean up the kitchen afterwards together instead of one person cooking and one cleaning. Just remember though, if you have a roommate/significant other/spouse, be careful not to imply that it’s their job to always keep you company… especially if s/he is an introvert and needs alone time for their own self-care.

If you manage your energy effectively, you will also manage your time effectively… getting things done more effectively not to mention having more fun.

The other key to managing your energy as an extrovert is learning to relax into being alone sometimes. Introverts do need companionship, and extroverts do need some quiet alone time. For those tasks where it truly does make the most sense to focus intensely on your own and get it done, remind yourself that some time with just yourself can be good for you. Set up chunks of time for this that are reasonable in length, and build in some breaks in which you interact with others a bit. It can also help to go somewhere where you can be alone in your focus, but still have the buzz of humanity around you — for instance, like taking your laptop to a coffee shop to work. And when you’re done with a project that required focused work on your own, reward yourself by calling up a friend or going out dancing or something